What To Sacrifice?

I picked my #oneword2020 as a way to challenge my status quo. I do not have a platform.  I do not have one educational passion that I am known for. At times, I feel quite directionless. I don’t even know what I want for my future goals. Scratch that, I know, but none of my options are exclusive. I want it all. And I can’t have it all. This has been a “problem” for me for as long as I can remember. I. Want. It. All. I want all the shoes. I want all the hair styles. I want all the social media platforms. I want all the ways my career could flourish. I want all the family. I want all the dedication. The thing is, I can’t have it all.  

I never understood the expression “Have your cake and eat it too.”  Well of course if you have cake, you’re going to eat it. That makes no sense. However, as I grow older, though not necessarily wiser, I realize that it’s not about the eating of the cake. It’s about having it when you’re done. If I choose one path, I can’t have the other one. If I choose to eat the cake now, I won’t have it when I’m really craving it. 

So, with all that said, how do I know what to do?  Do I find a focus and put all my energy into that?  Do I go into a educational field that isn’t exactly in K12 schools?  Do I try and create my own path?  Do I keep trying for that leadership position?  Do I try and teach from home?  

Now, please don’t misunderstand. I’m not complaining. I am beyond grateful to have all of these visions for my future (and more)!  I guess I’m looking for direction.  I’m looking for advice. How did you choose?  Why did you choose?  Is what you sacrificed for what you chose worth it?  

I’m scared I will chose the wrong sacrifice.